Sarah Palin Is a Genius. Admit It.

Sarah Palin has everyone right where she wants them, critics and supporters alike. She is a sheer genius. She is on this bus tour of historical sites in the Northeast and, at first glance, you would think that she didn't know much about history. Case in point:


Okay, that looks bad. The history teacher in me cringed at her "on the surface" butchering of American history. Of course, Paul Revere wasn't warning the British (he was warning the Minutemen, notably Sam Adams), and he was not riding through the streets ringing bells and firing his gun so that we could keep the right to bear arms. But, why quibble over minor historical facts? Who reads history anyway?  Its so out of date. Sarah Palin, on her American History Tour, shouldn't really be expected to know the history of the places that she is visiting, right? Or . . . maybe she knows far more than she is letting on. 

Consider this:  She is not letting the media know where she is going next. This is driving them crazy. But, someone has to know. She wants some of her supporters there. So, it would make sense for her to drop clues at each stop to let her supporters know where she is headed. I'm no supporter of Sarah Palin, but I think I cracked her code. 

It all stared with my friend, Marty Duren, on Facebook saying the following:  " On the positive side, we could always sing the Paul Revere theme song, "C'mon Ring Those Bells." 

Now, that song is a well-known Christian Christmas song. Sarah Palin is a Christian, so I surmised that she was likely familiar with it. Then, I began to put the pieces together.

I replied to Marty (edited for more content here):

"Yes, Marty, the next line of that song is "light the Christmas tree." She is now speaking in code in her veiled reference to Christmas through say that Paul Revere (Revolutionary) was ringing bells (Christmas song).  Even though this happened in 1775, everyone knows that the primary year of the Revolution was 1776 (duh). So, she is talking about Christmas, 1776, obviously!  She's preparing her followers for her visit to Valley Forge and to commemorate Washington's crossing of the Delaware on December 25, 1776 when he surprised the Hessians at Trenton and began to turn the war around! She is dropping historical clues so that the savvy know where she is headed next. The symbolism is that she is going to make a surprise attack on the modern day Hessians (liberals = Marxists – Marx was German, get it?) and it will be like Christmas in America again, which of course is a take off on Reagan's "It's morning in America" campaign ad from his 1984 reelection campaign. She was really saying that she is the new Reagan and she was going to defeat the liberals in a surprise attack that would renew America and restore our freedom and greatness. She's brilliant. Like I said, #historymatters."

Washington_Crossing_Delaware So, from this we know that she is headed to Valley Forge and will likely cross the Delaware while standing at the front of a rowboat, exactly like George Washington did on Christmas Day, 1776 (see the photo?).  The world is laughing at Sarah Palin over her supposed gaffe at Paul Revere's house, but in reality, she is pulling one over on everybody.  She is actually a historical genius and is able to weave together significant clues as to her next moves, seemingly out of thin air!   

If you aren't convinced that Sarah Palin is a political genius after this, you probably won't ever be. Deal with that, Democrats! 


Disclaimer: Okay, before anyone gets mad or offended, this was all tongue-in-cheek, obviously, and it meant to make the point that actually knowing history is important. Wish I didn't have to give disclaimers for satirical posts, but I can anticipate someone thinking that I am being mean-spirited. Anyone can make a mistake, but actually knowing what happened in the past IS important. Or, it should be, especially for political leaders.

5 Responses to Sarah Palin Is a Genius. Admit It.

  1. Have you considered investing in a pair of black horn-rimmed glasses and a chalkboard?

  2. Hmmm. That’s a Glenn Beck reference, I assume? I can only come up with one conspiracy a month, not one a day.

  3. Sarah did not ‘lie’ about Paul Revere. She actually said what she ‘thought’ was the correct story . . . ‘course it wasn’t, but she didn’t know that, and we can’t hold her accountable for not knowing, can we?
    Not Sarah. Anyone else, maybe. But not Sarah.
    I’m going over to Wikileaks and change the story of Paul Revere to match Sarah’s version.
    (Now, what exactly was it she said ???????)